When one or both people in a relationship retire, everyday life changes dramatically. No matter how eagerly the retirement has been anticipated and how happy the retiree is to be free of the old grind, it is still a massive life change and requires a huge adjustment. Although retirement is usually expected, it can still feel like a shock… and not just for the retiree. His or her partner might find it equally difficult to adjust to the new normal. With couples counselling, retirees and their partners can smooth the rough edges of this milestone and start the next part of their life together more prepared.
We’ve all heard the jokes about men retiring and suddenly the wife feels her territory and personal time are invaded. Those jokes are popular because there is a kernel of truth in them! While the first days and weeks of retirement can feel like a vacation, eventually the novelty wears off and the reality sets in. What does one do with one’s time? All those hobbies and long delayed projects might not take up as much time as expected. So the retiree starts to go looking for new ways to keep busy around the house, inadvertently disrupting the wife’s daily patterns. His efforts to be helpful may feel invasive to her, even controlling, but usually annoying. Of course, this is not exclusive to traditional married couples. No matter what the gender or employment status of the two partners are, when one retires, their daily patterns are knocked out of orbit and it takes some time and effort to get back into a balanced, harmonious state.
Couples Counselling, Retirees and the Future
Any life change brings stress. Marriage, moving house, starting a new job and the arrival of a child can all be joyful but also stressful changes. It’s easy for a couple that has been together for decades to feel like they’ve been through so much, they can handle anything. But there is no rule against benefitting from some professional help with couples counselling.
The start of one or both partner’s retirement can also be a time to refocus on the relationship. All that free time can be used to build more joy into the relationship. It’s easy to let romance get pushed aside in the hustle and bustle of life. Career, children and other responsibilities often demand to be put centre stage, and when they finally become less demanding, couples can need some guidance on refocusing on each other and rediscovering each other.
No one is too old for couples counselling. Retirement really can be golden, especially if a couple’s relationship is strong and healthy. Like your own health, the health of relationship needs attention from time to time to keep it in top shape. Retirement can be a golden opportunity to nurture a relationship or it can be source of stress and strain. By seeking couples counselling in London, retirees can make sure they have a joyful retirement rekindling the romance in their relationship.